Advice

I have learned something very important in the past few months.  If you cannot get what you want from someone.  Find someone else.

New Blog

So since rope climbing season I have become inspired to write about rope climbing.  This new blog can be found at http://trprincess.blogspot.com and it is the best blog about top roping I have ever read.  Oh. Did I mention that I'm writing it?  Check it out.  It does not have the relationship drama that this blog has.

Ovulation and Other Struggles

If you guys can recall I mentioned something about a new younger man last time I wrote.  Little did I know that I was ovulating at the time and since I have been on birth control for the past decade I had no idea what it was really like to ovulate.  Now I know.  It is fucking intense and it also clouds any sort of judgement I might have had.  I asked that guy out while I was ovulating and then by the time our date rolled around I was no longer ovulating so luckily I had some friends that wanted to tag along on our "date".  Horrible thing, ovulation.  Really puts a damper on things and makes it much more difficult to rebound.  I might as well throw in the towel and just say that I'm not going to sleep with anyone until I know that I want to be with them.  I know myself too well and I know that I have issues with jealously, trust, and relationships in general so I'm just going to play it safe.  Nothing sucks more than to sleep with someone and then see them with someone else even if you did not give a shit about them.  OK there are a couple of things that suck more than to have your ego trampled but it is high up on my personal list of things that suck.
On another note, I competed in a college climbing comp and that was just a blast.  I climbed like total shit but I actually had a good time.  I placed in 3rd but it was a small coup on my part because I did not let my green eyed monster get the best of me.  I realized that the only reason why I was upset about losing to this other girl before was that I was craving attention and I wanted the attention she was getting because of her awesome climbing ability.  The fact of the matter is, and this is going to sound "hella" egotistical, I don't need to climb well to get attention and I actually get more attention and support by just being honest.  Also, I'm climbing great compared to a year ago so I'm do the best that I can do and mad rock jocks love me for it.
Finally, it has been almost three months since my ex and I broke up and besides this overwhelming sense of loneliness, sexual frustration, and crying fits after a good day of climbing, all is going alright.  

A Team for the Non-Sport

Well.  Looks like I'm well on my way to accomplishing something great.  Now for all this horrible paper work.  Thank goodness for the motivated individuals that are helping to make this happen.  I am blessed with the good and the bad.  I am also blessed with an extended stay at the Red River during the summer which is, yet again, good and bad.

Like I Give a Shit.

I am so grateful that at the very least I know who my good friends are and although most of  them don't like spending time hanging from finger fucking holds does not mean that they are not wonderful people with passions and past times of their very own.  I find that this point in my life has been a godsend when figuring out who is there for me and who is not.  For example, I knew that none of my ex's friends liked me but since we share this small world of climbing, I know that I will have to put up with them in one fashion or another.  You see, my real friends called, emailed, text messaged, facebooked and stopped by to see how I was doing when my ex and I split.  BUT did any of my "friends" from my former relationship even bother?  No. 

 I climbed with someone for two days at Rocktown and they even asked me how I was doing but these fake ass bitches from Brevard, NC that I had known for well over a year did not even bother to say something over Facebook.  The funny thing about it is that if I run into them, which unfortunately is likely, they are going to put on such an act that even Grace Kelly would believe it.  Too bad I have an refined my ability to detect white trash.  Finally, the time has come for the best sort of revenge, a life well lived.  

The Hunt

Oh what an attractive specimen that has been trust upon my plate.  This young, unaware, and juicy prey.  I know, I know.  I should not pursue something that does not make a full meal but what is wrong with a little snack?  I think this could be one my best ideas as of yet and I have had some signs from the heavens that have informed me that this young man is just the thing I have been looking for since my break up.  I have been reading this forum and one of the recent topics was "Getting Over Someone is as Easy as Getting Under Someone" and although I have attempted to transcend such courses of action I do believe that this time it is absolutely necessary.  

I am sad to inform you all but as it turns out, recent findings have been uncovered and have led me to the conclusion that my ex boyfriend of a year and a half was pining over someone else during the duration of our relationship.  Not only was he pining after someone else but as it turns out this person actually rejected him.  

Typical.  

All that bullshit about being insecure, constantly being suspicious that I was going to cheat on him, and all the other bullshit was just him and his fucked up little mind the WHOLE TIME.  Basically, he was projecting his own intent and his own fucked up attitude on not only me but our whole relationship.  Therefore, I am absolved of all guilt and I personally take great satisfaction in hearing about his bad luck.  Poor little bitch. 

 

Back to the pre-course at hand... This is going to be too much fun. OX

The Sieve

Good news.  Finally.  I will be meeting with the sports council on Wednesday along with the future VP and Treasurer of the Climbing Team!  I am looking forward to finally becoming official and getting these folks some gym time.  It is really tough to see students that love climbing but cannot afford to go to the climbing gym.  I hope that the team will be able to provide that for its members along with some awesome service work with the CCC and other organizations.  If this goes according to plan then the Climbing Team will be one of my greatest achievements and will provide a significant benefit to every member.  Needless to say, I have my fingers crossed.      
Also, I have found a great way of managing my blooming social life, school and training and it is called saying NO.  Yep.  One simple word has done wonders for me and surprisingly enough it is also my ticket to getting laid by one of the sexiest and smartest bitches I have met thus far.  Although, I am still open to other options I do believe this man might be the band-aid to my broken heart.  I am so grateful.

Metal on Teflon

All the fucker had to say was sorry.  Now they all have hell to pay.  Bitches.  

And the Beast Showed its True Colors

I must write about this because it must stop.  So I went to Vegas.  Yep, good ol' Red Rocks.  I roped up for a day with a total stranger and could not take any pictures but the next day I went bouldering in Calico Cannon and it was freaking sweet.  The rock is a smooth slightly over hung sandstone and it has  very small in-cut crimps that are pretty sharp but there are also tons of roofs with larger holds.  In order for you to get the picture there is this one boulder before you enter the Wash Area called "Monkey Bar".  I hope that gives you some indication as to what you will experience in the Red Rocks bouldering areas.
Ok.  I am only writing this because once I write about it I can put it behind me.  Well, the weekend before last I went to the Red River, KY and met up with some friends of mine and I had a BLAST.  It was the best trip I have ever taken to the Red River but as I was leaving Torrent and driving home I became overwhelmed with sadness.  And I boo-hooed for 15 minutes in my car on the way back to North Carolina because I kept thinking about my ex and how much fun he would have had and how I wished he had been there to see me climb.  I don't  mean to brag for someone who boulders pretty much year around, I climbed pretty well that weekend.
Then, when I came back from an awesome day of bouldering in Red Rocks I boo-hooed for 5 minutes because once again, I was thinking about my ex and how he would have totally crushed a majority of the harder climbs I saw that day and how proud he would have been of my climbing.  I hope now I can put this to rest because I do not want my climbing trips to be sullied by tears for an individual totally annihilated my heart.  He is not worthy of such an honor.

Forlorn Packing

I have to pack.  Have to get out of this town... just kidding.  I'm going to my sister's wedding. Which will be very  interesting although I am not, and I am being perfectly honest here, looking forward to the wedding aspect of the trip.  I just don't like weddings, period.  I know that this is an important day for my sister so the best will be made of the day.  It may seem a little odd that I don't like weddings, most women my age 'love going to weddings' or more likely love being the bride in them.  It is not because I don't believe in the whole marriage contract or that I am disillusioned and no longer believe that there is lasting love because I do (no pun intended). But I just find myself feeling pretty awkward when I attend formal gatherings.  It is just not my thing.  Although, I really don't mind the whole dressing up part nor do I mind the whole climbing aspect of the trip either.

Red Tape

The past two days I have felt a knot in my chest.  It feels as if the whole world is against me.  I am trying to start a climbing team for my school and it seems like the odds are stacked against me.  There is so much red tape that I fear my perseverance will be in vain and I will fail at this task.  Also, I had a strange social interaction yesterday that has left a sour taste in my mouth and I find that even my most simple of objectives are being held up by obstacles in my path, namely other people.  I hope that by continuing on this path that I am endowed with the strength and the knowledge to overcome these obstacles and eventually surpass even my own personal expectations.  Now, to walk forward.

Mating Call.

Spring fever has infected everyone.  Even myself.  It has been a rough couple of weeks due to the readjusting that I have had to do since my break up.  Honestly, I do miss my ex although he did not treat me very well but most importantly I miss the sex.  We had great sex, in fact it is the best sex I have ever had so far.  We were together for a year and a half and so you get used to having great sex and then when your suddenly without great sex, you just feel like crap.  Plain and simple.  The funny thing about it was that I was very close to sending him an email and asking him if he wanted to have sex with me with me but then I was downtown and I ran into some mutual acquaintances and they were acting kind of strange towards me.  I flat out asked them what was wrong and they claimed that my ex had told people that I was psycho and so he had to change his cell phone number because I kept calling him.  So I had to waste 15 infuriating minutes of my life explaining to them that I have not spoken to him since we broke up and how I specifically wrote him a letter that clearly stated that I never wished to speak to him again.  Not only was I caught totally off guard by this but it also ruled out any possibility of me asking him to sleep with me.  To be perfectly honest, it really hurt my feelings.  Not only was he a total asshole to me during the duration of our relationship, by constantly walking out on me and being a manipulative cock sucker, but he also has to be an asshole to me when we are not even sleeping together!  Overall, it was just painful weekend.  To make matters worse I've been looking at cock pictures on craigslist and I have been watching too much YouPorn.  I'm surprised I don't leave a fucking slug trail everywhere I go.  Talk about being sexually frustrated.  It has been so challenging that I have actually considered smoking cigarettes again just to take my mind off sex.  UHHHHH!  It makes me so pissed off because these guys that keep bothering me are just not good enough for me and so having a rebound is out of the question.  At least not until I find someone that is worthy of my time.  I'm not talking about some pasty ass 90 lbs weakling.  I'm talking about some fine ass bitch with a good tan from working outside, big rough hands, and...  you get the picture.  That bitch better get me off too because I fucking deserve it.    

Today was a tough day

The past can be so haunting. 

A Single Pirate Life for Me

Being single in the spring time is scary.  I don't know what happened to men but lately they have been shameless towards me.  I've been asked out almost everywhere I go.  The grocery store, the gas station, the gym, Walmart.  But it is not so much the simple act of being asked out but they manner in how they go about it.  Just being abruptly asked out without any sort of signal on my part.  It is flattering but I know better than to go out with someone that is not the least bit afraid of me.  They should be scared and if they are not then something is wrong with them.  Plain and Simple. 

Climbing with a Green Eyed Monster

Here in North Carolina the year around climbers are beginning to make their transition from bouldering season to rope season.  We begin to contemplate those first intensely terrifying leads and the falls soon to follow.  But some of us are lucky enough to complete the projects of the season.  I, unfortunately, have not been so lucky.  It seems the tick list has only gotten longer and those intermediate sends are still months away.  All the while my fellow climbers get to spray about their latest conquests on Facebook and I of course have to say something positive about it. Nothing like the short but sweet "like" button.  But do I really like it?  Fuck No.  I'm jealous as a preening peacock and I'm not sure if I'm fine with that.  It is said that once you harness the roots of jealously, you will not only be able to control the energy that you put into it but you will also be able to actually attain what you truly desire.  In the mean time I suppose I will be hitting the "like" button a few more times.

Ta DA!

So here I am.  Back again.  No point in trying not to write because if I'm going to write then someone else better be fucking reading it or stealing it.  So here is the update:
Well my ex and I are done forever.  Yep. Forever.  And although I do still occasionally think about him, I'm kind of glad that its over forever.  Let's just face it, he did not appreciate me at all and you guys knew this the whole time.  The only issue with this is now I will have to find something else to bitch about besides my newfound ex.  I can still bitch about climbing of course but I'm afraid that will only hold your attention for so long.  No worries, I have a solution, I've already started dating someone else so I'll just bitch about him.  Problem solved.  Glad I got to talk about myself to you guys once again.  See you again really soon.